Our new baby is here! I promise to share more about her surprising birth soon. My toddler is absolutely infatuated with her, as are we all. Big sister is also obsessed with nursing. Seeing her baby sister nurse all the time is a constant reminder, so distraction no longer works as it did when Nursing While Pregnant. At times tandem nursing (or breastfeeding two children) seems more trouble than it’s worth. Breastfeeding while pregnant continued naturally for us, but this new stage has made me consider the pros and cons of weaning vs. continuing to tandem breastfeed.
Here are some of the pros and cons of tandem nursing in the first two months for us…
Benefits of Tandem Nursing
As I shared previously, my milk didn’t come in until 8 days postpartum after my first was born. She initially lost a lot of weight and regained it slowly. What a difference! This time my milk came in on day 2! Baby Bird #2 is gaining weight quickly. Another benefit is that since I never stopped nursing, my nipples never got sore or cracked this time.
Drawbacks of Tandem Nursing
I was one of the lucky ones that could manage the discomfort of Breastfeeding While Pregnant. But for some reason, I find my toddler’s latch very uncomfortable now. It is weird, I feel like the newborn nursing is natural and comfortable and releases oxytocin, but the toddler nursing just feels “off” to me most of the time. Though there are times, such as when she is hurt, that I am so glad to be able to comfort her in this way.
The biggest frustration I have with tandem nursing is the tantrums my toddler has demanding nursing. This above all is what makes me consider weaning.
What works for us
Although distraction no longer works for my toddler, she is appeased by even the shortest amount of time nursing. In fact, she asks for “a tiny, tiny bit” when she asks to nurse. I use a “countdown” or tell her that I will count to three and on three we will end. For the most part that works. I used to be able to only offer one side, but now she demands both sides. Fortunately, even ten-fifteen seconds is enough for her sometimes.
Verdict?
I consulted my online breastfeeding support group about her nursing tantrums and my frustration. The most helpful advice I got was to separate our readiness for weaning from toddler tantrums. My daughter knows what she wants and she wants it NOW. Another mom reminded me that if we are able to end her tantrums over nursing at inopportune times, another desire will replace it. Light bulb, she has the same tantrums over our phones, tv, you name it… If we didn’t struggle with this issue, there would likely be something else to negotiate as she adjusts to having a sister.
I suppose in the end I still feel like she benefits from nursing. Might as well continue to take it day by day.
Additional Resources for Tandem Nursing
The Boob Group Podcast | The Scoop on Tandem Nursing
http://www.theboobgroup.com/the-scoop-on-tandem-nursing
La Leche League | Links to Tandem Nursing Resources
http://www.lalecheleague.org/nb/nbtandem.html
KellyMom.com | PDF, Nursing Two
http://kellymom.com/nursingtwo/resources/tandem-faq.pdf
Mothering.com | Tandem Nursing
http://www.mothering.com/community/a/tandem-nursing
BreastfeedingBasics.com | Nursing During Pregnancy and Tandem Nursing
http://www.breastfeedingbasics.com/articles/nursing-during-pregnancy-and-tandem-nursing
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